What does a good man look like? the Good Coach

Tonight I was watching a documentary on one of my favorite actors, John Candy, and the things his friends said about him made me think of what makes a good man, a loved man. They said he was kind, generous, devoted to his family and his friends. He was NOT quick to take offense although often things were said about his weight, for example, that hurt him. He moved on. He was a man who picked up the tab even when he was with actors who were making the same money he was making. He was expansive.

My favorite movie with Joh Candy was

Cool Runnings

because his character as a coach was like that - humorous, kind, generous, funny. It was not the usual image of a coach. The antithesis would be J. K. Simmons as the coach in the movie Whiplash, where the coach is so demeaning, insulting, enraged and demanding that his student ends up committing suicide. John Candy didn't have a cruel bone in his body.

We are all waiting for the new season of Ted Lasso, another film about a good man, a coach who cares more about character than exploiting his team to generate money. Money cannot be the most important thing - it is material - it goes away - it really does not buy happiness. It may buy stuff but stuff doesn't make us happy for more than the few seconds after we buy it - if that long. What makes us happy is connections with other people, love makes us happy. Being good makes love and happiness.

If you haven't seen Ted Lasso yet, I heartily recommend it In this era of bullies and crass, ignorant, cruel public figures, it is nice to be reminded of what good men are like And it is good to remember the good men we have known and what it was about them that made us love them and made us think of them as good. Happy Trails wrightj45@yhaoo.com