This morning as I had my coffee, I was shuffling through the basket that holds my ever growing pile of magazines, journals, budget books and so on, looking for a magazine to read. The heavy and substantial MUZZLELOADER, still in its plastic wrap made its presence felt, and this time, in stead of burying under the New Yorker and more favored magazines, I took it out.
I am not stupid although it is still possible for me to make stupid mistakes from time to time and this magazine is a perfect example. I must explain: Because it was advertised in Early American Life, which was for many many years my favorite magazine, I was entirely mistaken in what I assumed would be its content. I know, when something says "GUNS" it is probably about guns, but, they always listed in the advertisements in EAL that it was also about log cabins (which I used to love) and early American crafts, so I made an entirely erroneous assumption that it was called Muzzleloader just because that was an item of the period (just as in a case where a magazine might be called Spinning Wheel but might be about many Colonial crafts not just spinning wheels) but Muzzleoader magazine like EAL would be about Colonial life and re-enactors. It isn't. It is about guns.
Last week in the newest issue of Harpers, I read a shocking article about the proliferation of "permitless carry" laws in most states in the US as wwell as the tidal surge of sales of guns such that there are 120 guns for every 100 citizens in the US now. I am against guns. They have no purpose but to kill. They kill animals and people. And since the next question faced by anyone saying they are against guns is usually "Well, you eat meat don't you!" My answer isn that NO I do not eat meat and have been primarily a vegetarian sind the 1970's and I am perfectly healthy thank you - no choloesterol problems for example, no polyps in my ten year colonoscopies either. Unlike dogs or cats, we do not need to eat meat to be healthy. I have many vegan friends who are similarly in excellent health in our seventies. They are even healthier than I am because they hike more.
Over the many years of my life, it has grown in me to respect life in its myriad and miraculous forms. There is a comradeship in the flow of the life force through all of us sentient beings that I am in tune with. It breaks my heart to think of the miraculous being of life cut short unnecessarily, or worse, for entertainment.
Yesterday, when I was reading the Harpers article on the proliferation of guns and the avid marketing and purchase of them, I was thinking of GUnsmoke, an old tv show that was highly favored back in the days when families had one television and everyone had to sit in one room and watch the same thing. I do not in any way wish to return to those days for many reasons including that back in those days in the place where I lived and grew up, fathers literally ruled. So whetever Dad wanted to watch on tv, the rest of us watched. After all, Dad was the only one who worked or had money. He bought the house and he bought the television, so he ruled! There were compromises such as when Ed Sullivan had the Beatles on his show. And I didn't mind The Champagne Hour with Lawrence Welk. But to get back to Gunsmoke, there were elements of that show that already made me uneasy but I accepted it as the 'past' and as fiction. For example the only notable female character was the good hearted ever accepting and supportive Miss Kitty, barmaid at the local saloon. Did Miss Kitty have kids? Did she have sex with the Sherriff (played by James Arnett) Where were her kids? She wasn't married, that's for sure, but the sexy outfits and other hints suggested that some form of sexuality was going on in her life.
There was a lot of shooting and gun play in Gunsmoke, indeed, it was the way things were resolved. Bad men came into town and shot it up, robbed people, murdered ranchers, attacked the stage coach, drank and insulted and assaulted other people in the bar and on the street and the Sherriff and his trusty sidekick had to shoot them or use their guns to shoot enough of them that they could round up the rest and put them in jail. Those bad men were indeed scary, and I couldn't help but conflate them with the Nazi's in the war movies we also watched constantly as my father had served in the CCC, The Merchant Marines, and the Navy in the Pacific during WWII. WWII was his primary historic period of interest and another example of how violent force was necessary to curb and repulse the forceful energy of Bad Men like the Nazi's also a very scary bunch who robbed and murdered and had no compassion or mercy, only the power and the will and the weapons to destroy and to harm.
When I first was drawn to the Society of Friends everything about it seemed to fit me perfectly, the meditative silent worship, the respect for the inner light, the kindness and compassion of the people, the adoption of a sane and sober lifestyle without the greedy pursuit of wealth, and the equality of women. The one thing about which I could never feel quite certain, however, was the peace testimony because I had seen those bad men, the Nazi's and the outlaws and I knew they still existed because I lived in the city and evidence of their continued existence was clearly visible all around me. Could peace and compassion really stand up to the energy of violence, lust and murderous rage? I wasn't sure I was ready to die on the cross like Jesus for the peace testimony, although his message did go on to enlighten a good part of the world. He lived on in a remarkable way. I didn't feel that if I had to face up to a Nazi, my goodwill and Christian compassion would be sufficient. I thought I might prefer a gun.
I didn't have to decide immediately however, because the Friends allow for independent development and personal conscience, you can be a seeker, you don't have to buy it all hook, line and sinker, you can develop toward it. When William Penn faced the same confusion in regard to the peace testimony, he was told to "Carry the Sword as long as you can." In other words allow you conscience and the light within to show you the way.
I am pleased to say this was the last issue of Muzzleloader. I felt so uneasy about it, I didn't even pass it on as I usually do with my magzines. One image from within the attractively and evocatively photograph laden magazine was especillay disturbing to me, a father had passed on his legacy of shooting to his daughter and she was holding upside down the swan she had just killed. It was a tall as she. It almost made me cry, but I turned instead to writing this blog entry. I wonder how that daughter felt later, thinking of the beautiful creature she had destroyed, after the glow of her father's approval wore off and after her conscience and her consciousness had a chance to once again peek through. I thought about the swan's mate left to grieve for the rest of its life and the black lake left in darkness without the bright light of the swan, like a candle, to brighten it.
In my electronic news feed, which pops up when I open my cell phone to see if I have received any text messages or calls while I was sleeping and my phone was off, there was a short piece about President Biden sending 3000 American troops to Poland and Germany to reassure our NATO allies considering the massing of thousands of Russian troops on the border of the Ukraine, ready to invade and possibly spark World War III. The January 6th Insurrection and the article on the proliferation of guns, the many articles on the increase in road rage caused accidents and even the short piece I read on the truckers striking in Ottawa because they don't want to vaccinate against covid or wear masks, these and mamy other indications are that there is a green haze of violence and anarchy rising in the world and it frightens me, it is like an algae bloom suffocating a lake, or like the Covid epidemic itself, a madness and sickness of the soul.
A sad note but an example of the way, is that Thich Nhat Hanh died recently, the Zen Buddhist monk from war torn Vietnam who helped bring the Buddhist way to Americans. All you can ever do, I suppose, is work on yourself, and walk your own path, carrying the message that is in you. Sadly, Muzzleloader made me realize I am not as fond of the Colonial period as I once was. My path has diverged. For many years, I volunteered at a number of historic sites relating to the American Revolution and the colonial period, and I was raised in Philadelphia, south of the center of liberty in America. Now, however, I feel myself turned more and more away from that time when lives were limited in so many ways, but there was then, carried from England, the message of the Society of Friends, the LIGHT in the darkness of times of turmoil.
Happy Trails, Jo Ann
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