The Polar Vortex and being 80!

Ok, just so you know, there is an upbeat to each of my crises. Right now my ongoing crisis has been coping with transportation in regard to grocery shopping since the Polar Vortex dumped a bunch of snow on us and the Arctic Blast froze it into white concrete.

Crisis number one was getting my car out of the driveway because small drifts had formed against the tires and froze there. I hadn't prepared in advance for this event because it was somewhat unprecedented. This had never happened to me before, and I was unprepared because my neighbor said he would shovel me out when he shoveled his drive, but after he did it once, more snow came and he had so much to do, he couldn't keep up with my driveway too and his back went bad.

Neighbors scrambled for sold out ice melt products. I had asked my nephew Archie if he could stop on his way home from work and pick up some Ice Melt at Tractor Supply and I would give him $100 to spread it on the driveway and he said "NO."

My nephew, Godson, Archie is a good case in point for the late learned lesson that it isn't always 'us' who are to blame for the anger of a man, often it is self generated and we are simply the target. We used to have a fairly good relationship and he would do the occasional small job for a whacking good pay out. I always remembered his birthdays and Christmas with nice gifts. Then about 2 years ago, he took against me. I think it is because my sister and I are close and he has become deeply angry at her and dumps all his rage on her and I am connected to her, so I am now the 'enemy' as well.

On his birthday last February, I gave him a $99 AAA automobile service membership, a birthday card with some cash $25, and took him, his son and my sister for brunch at The Station in Woodbury. His reaction to his gift was "Why'd you buy that? I don't need that." followed by a dismissive little temper gesture. Needless to say, he has used the AAA membership three times this year. He has been so mean to my sister that she and I decided to stop appeasing and enabling him. He has never remembered my birthday or Christmas, or hers, and I decided to boycott his February 5th birthday this year. Neither my sister nor I gave him a card or a gift this year.

My sister came to the rescue after a week of being frozen in when I began to run out of some essentials - mostly cat stuff. She took an Uber over to my house and used a shovel to chip away the ice behind my back tires and then got in the car with me as I manuevered out between the high shoulders of plowed street snow that stood 3 feet high like the straits of Gibralter beside the driveway. We did a shopping and I took her home.

One of the problems I have had since then is that I have to put 'trax" (a kind of cleats, on the bottom of my shoes to get me safely over the frozen path and driveway to the car, but once in the car, because my back is so stiff and my knees don't bend I can't get the shoes off and remove the trax from the soles of the shoes. The tracks make walking on flooring treacherous because they act like tiny ice skates.

It has been a week stuck indoors - I didn't go to church, and I began to run out of some things I needed but my sister isn't available this weekend, so I was on my own. What to do?

Things were piling up because on top of everything else, all the sewing and painting, and the leaning on things to get to the car had caused my right wrist to go bad again. This is an affliction that assaults me every time I get into a period of over use. It is like a stress sprain that gets so bad, I can't lift a cup or a saucer, my wrist just gives out with some shocking pain. If I immediately put on a wrist brace and immobilize for a day or two, my wrist recovers; whatever has been aggravated calms down, and I can use my wrist again, so that is what I did yesterday. I took the day off and did nothing, and my wrist recovered.

But what that meant was that the dishes piled up, the litter needed scooping, some broken things needed repair and I had to go to the ShopRite for groceries today. How to get those cleats off so I could walk safely into the store myself instead of waiting in the car while my sister did it for me. In the car, I used the short snow scraper to lift my shoes up to my lap after I kicked them off on the floor, took off the cleats, dropped the shoes on the pavement and slid down into them, did the shopping, back in the car, I lifted the shoes up again and put the cleats so when I got home, I could safely carry the three heavy bags, one at a time of course, into the house.

This morning and yesterday morning, I was on empty in the happiness tank. I felt old and weak and helpless, even a little humiliated and unwilling or unable to think how to get help. But I dug down and found my character and got to the store, had a rest, did the dishes, put the groceries away, fed the dog and now I am typing this. Success! Triumph over adversity! I also sent text messages to two of my old Senior group friends who have it much harder than I have. One has a wheelchair bound husband and has just been diagnosed with liver disease herself, the other has no car and has to find ways to manage her three huge dogs with minimal help from her son.

What I learned from my experience is next year have the Ice Melt on HAND and use it! Also, look into ShopRite home delivery! AND do not sign up for any more classes.

Another crisis hanging over me had been that I spent a lot of money to take a quilting course which I thought would be good for me learning something new and meeting more women. The course was $120, the materials $120 and I don't like it. It is too hard for me - too much measuring and sewing machine use. I am the least experienced in the class and they are all too young for me - in their 60's mostly. My sewing machine needle broke, and I replaced it but the replacement needle fell into the machine and I can't get it out. The sewing machine repair guy has not returned my call. I am behind in class and this is another chore I need to resolve today. I have to see if the machine will work as I am advised by a google search on what to do if your needle falls into the machine.

The description of the course never mentioned that I needed a machine. I thought we would sew by hand (ha!) and it said they had machines for us to use. Turns out they do but it is required that you do most of the work at home!

Unfortunately this sewing takes place as I am trying to finish the art work for the annual March Women's History Group Art Show at the Haddon Fortnightly, and again, I have spent too much money and time to let it go. I have to get it finished! Pressure - stress - chores.

The added stress is keeping hte kitty litter empty of poop becaue the dog has become obsessed with eating poop every chance she gets and the fat left in the excrement from the cat food causes her to have a relapse of her pancretitis, so I am on consant alert to keep the litter done (wrist problem) as well as to keep the gates chained (every time I have to go to the bathroom myself) so she can't get out of the living room to eat out of litter boxes in the bath or bedroom. All these little obstacles.

My painting table came apart and had to be glued together too. - small stuff but it piles up, like used up stuff you need from the grocery - cat food, toilet paper, milk, crackers, cheese.

Right now the "severe weather warning Polar Vortex Wind" is smacking every loose thing against the house and shaking the windows and puffing on walks like it is the wolf blowing my house down. Even the animals show concern - looking up from their naps when a particularly vigorous gust rattles our little pig hovel made of twigs.

It's all ok. I am home from my trip to the store, the groceries are away, we are supplied well enough to last until my next pay day and I have treats for the end of the day when everything is done and I am on the sofa wrapped in my electric lap blanket and watching something on my laptop - stand-up comedy by Tom Papa or Mick Birbiglia or Kathleen Madigan, or perhaps this weekend - The Winter Olympics in Milan! Although when I tried to sign up with peacock streaming service to watch it, my password was denied, then my e-mail was denied with the caution that my e-mail was already belonging to someone else (probably me from the summer Olympics when I had subdcribed to Peacock and then after the month, canceled.) They don't seem to have software programmers who have expected such an ocurrence, which I would thing was pretty common, so I don't know if I can find a way to see the Olympics. I would like to, and I bought microwaveable popcorn just in case I figure it out.

For next year - 1.a supply of Ice Melt early in the season, 2.Home delivery option from Shop-Rite, 3.No joining any courses and it may be time to re-think entering the Women's History Group Show - it turns out to be a challenge I relish but spend far too much time and money on. I have to respect the needs of my deteriorating joints too.

Well, today I overcame most of my obstacles and I have gotten a confidence and lift from it which helps me feel like I can manage the rest of my chores. I also have to do the laundry! Maintaining means getting chores done EVERY day and taking a day off here and there causes a pile up. Fortunately, this time, I got lucky and with a latte' found a little wave of optimism and energy to tackle the pile up and probably get it all done, and that gives me a sense of hope that I am ABLE. This too shall pass - and Spring will come and summer, and I will work on getting in better shape to face the next winter. And feel encouraged about managing this one. My friends who are my age have looked into the future and seen friends a relatives a few years down the road and we are seeing tough times ahead - we have to prepare. Hope you are managing through the Polar Vortex, the Arctic Blast and the Bomb Cyclone too! wrightj45@yahoo.com